Kyman OneShot Collections
by Kymanlvr
Summary: A series of one-shots related to the relationship between Kyle and Cartman from South Park. None of these are meant to go in any particular order, and have no relation with one another. Rated M now so that I won't forget to change it later.
1. Morphed

It would be easy to say that Kyle hated Cartman. In fact, Kyle hated almost every aspect of Cartman. He hated how he always had to be right. He hated that he constantly got Kyle to take his bets, and how he usually ended up making Kyle do something horrible once he won it. He hated how racist and bigoted he was. But for some reason, Kyle found himself drawn to the other boy, and over the years the hate had morphed into something different. Now it was something a bit more playful. Now the tension between them had changed from what it was before. And although Kyle wouldn't admit it to anyone, including at times himself…

"_Shut up, Fatass!"_

"_Whatever, Jew."_

_Kyle glared over the lunch table at Cartman, but the anger wasn't there. Cartman glanced casually over at him, meeting his eyes, and a small hint of a smirk played on his lips. Kyle couldn't stop his lips from mimicking the same expression._

… he loved their arguments.


	2. Snap

Cartman was highly amused.

He has accused Kyle of being gay for his best friend, and the red-head was shouting furiously back in his face, denying the fact that he was in love with Stan. His cheeks were flushed pink, and his eyes glared daggers at his enemy. Cartman simply smiled, enjoying the fact that after so many years he could still get this reaction from the boy.

"Fuck you, Fatass… you're queerer than anyone I know. You put Butter's dick in your mouth, you wanted me to suck your balls…"

Cartman felt his anger rise. "You stupid Jew! I am not gay! That… that made Butter's gay… and you! You and I had an agreement! That was all!"

"Whatever. You WANTED me to suck your balls, Cartman. Homo."

"Goddamn ginger!"

"Don't call me that, Fatass!"

"I'm not fat!"

"Fuck you!"

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"NO!"

Cartman shoved Kyle, to which Kyle responded by kicking the other boy in the shin.

"OW YOU FUCKING JEW!"

The two boys started a pushing war, shoving each other a few times before Cartman shoved harder and Kyle flew against the wall. Kyle glared, but before he could react, Cartman was pinning him to the wall.

"Fuck you, Cartman, fuck you!" Kyle yelled, fighting against the other boy.

"I would think given our personalities that YOU would be the one getting fucked."

"No way. Not that I would ever sleep with you, but I would totally be on top."

"I don't think so. I think…. that you secretly like the idea of being dominated."

Kyle paused in his struggling to give Cartman an incredulous look.

"…what?"

"I think you secretly like it. Like all of this. This fighting and bickering that you do. Struggling to get the upper hand… and I think that you also like losing to me. You LIKE it when I win."

"That doesn't even make sense."

"I like it… our bickering. Don't you?"

Kyle paused again, blinking up into Cartman's face. He was lost for words. Like? Bickering? With HIM? There was no way he enjoyed bickering with Cartman, but…

"Why the hell would I like it?"

"Please… You probably get off on it."

"Sick, dude!"

Cartman leaned closer in, and Kyle's breath caught in his throat. His heart sped up a bit in his chest, and his stomach did a flip or two. He felt his face get hot.

"Then why are you blushing?"

"I am NOT blushing!" Kyle's flush got redder.

"Are too."

"Am not! I'm just… beyond mad!"

"Are you?" Cartman leaned a bit closer, and Kyle was finding it was becoming more and more difficult to breathe.

"Y-yeah…" He was finding it harder to talk, too. And think.

"You don't like this… even just a little?" Cartman's voice had lowered in both volume and tone, and he was mere inches away from Kyle. Kyle nervously licked his lips.

"N-no way…" he whispered.

Kyle's eyes shot to Cartman's mouth as he licked his own lips. Kyle pursed his lips together, quickly looking back up into Cartman's eyes. He was startled to realize that Cartman looked completely serious now.

Gently, Cartman cupped Kyle's jaw in his hand, and tilted his head up. Kyle caught his breath again, his eyes widening slightly, as Cartman brushed his lips against his. It was very gentle, which surprised Kyle. He slowly closed his eyes, and Cartman deepened the kiss. Eventually, Kyle found that he was returning the kiss shyly. When Cartman felt Kyle respond back, he kissed back harder, flicking Kyle's bottom lip with his tongue, and pressed his body against Kyle's. Kyle gasped, arching up into Cartman, and the taller boy slid his tongue inside Kyle's mouth.

They rubbed against each other roughly, kissing each other harder and harder, Cartman's hands sliding around Kyle's ass and Kyle's scratching Cartman's back.

They suddenly pulled away from each other simultaneously, gasping and staring wide-eyed at each other in shock.


	3. Complicated

Things were always complicated between Cartman and Kyle. They almost always fought with each other. If Cartman believed something, Kyle believed the opposite. If Kyle enjoyed doing something, Cartman would complain about it to the end. However, it got more complicated when Kyle came out in high school. Cartman started thinking about the Jew in rather provocative ways, which left the larger boy frustrated and aroused. Kyle felt equally frustrated by the fact that he secretly fantasized about being dominated by the other boy. Many nights, Kyle would touch himself, imagining what it would be like to have sex with Cartman. Cartman also found himself in similar situations. They both hated themselves for these secret urges, but hated each other more.

Things were always complicated, and probably always would be.


End file.
